I was gonna make a post on more of the beginning of my relaionship and how DD was for me. But I just felt the need to rant. I am on twitter and I had posted a few things about how I thought women should be submissive to their husbands but I soon got attacked but a female. Yeah I know her in my everyday life. We were aquaintances, my husband used to work with her ex. We tried to be friends with them, but my husband didn't really like how she talked to her man. She really didn't respect him and seemed like she bossed him around. They ended up breaking up and she started dating someone new. She found me on twitter and started bashing me. Now her new man has taking to bashing me for letting my husband have the lead. Her man is in the army so he thinks I'm undoing what he "fought for and almost died for women's freedom not to submit to their husbands". Ok thing is I feel women should if their husband is trustworthy of submission. And I think that is why there are so many divorce rates in the US because of women now not letting men be men.
I mean she brags about how she makes him put her first and boss him around. Ok fine, do I agree? No, but I don't get why people have to attack us. And just yesterday his daughter attacked me for no reason also. I never did mention her, I only said that his girlfriend should leave how I live alone and I felt sorry for men who can't be men. Has anyone else had the same experience with people like this? I'm just tired of how society has the gender roles. I don't like to be in a grocery store and see a woman yelling at her husband or telling him off or what HE is gonna do. I won't say submission came easy to me because it didn't and like I said I do not like the discipline but I do see how close it makes us and how much better my marriage is for it. I'm happy letting my husband be MAN. I'm sorry all men aren't allowed to be MEN.
Yeah my husband is strict and he needs to be. If he wasn't I wouldn't have the respect for him I do. TO me it makes a marriage more stronger.
I am thankful that I have the right not to submit. I believe that all women should have that right. But I am also grateful that I have the right TO submit.
ReplyDeleteAnd I think that having rights to choose either path is what freedom to choose something is all about.
It's difficult when people decide to attack our choices like that.
Sarah, It's really about personal choice, what is right for you may not be right for another couple. What is right for you at this moment may not be right for you in 2, 5 or 10 years. Couples tend to evolve over time. Try not get stuck on one or two rigid ideas to define yourself.
ReplyDeleteWe've been at this a while
Laurie
I sounds like you've been through the mill. hugs. I agree with the other 2 comments, but I also feel that they should not attack you for you and your hubby's way of life. its all about what works for you. but I also agree with your point regarding that men are not allowed to be men any more. Its been taken away from them through so many ways including the media.
ReplyDeleteI know its hard, but try to put them out of your mind. I dont have a twitter account, or really understand how it works. but can u get them off your list of followers?
hugs
TW
I think maybe part of the problem was saying that you felt sorry for men who couldn't be men. There are lots of different ways to be a man, and being an "HoH" is just one way to be a man. There are many others. There are men who submit to their wives in a marriage, and there are men who enjoy switching as part of spanking play. I agree with Laurie that it might be helpful to realize that what works for your particular marriage is just one idea that will most likely change and evolve over time.
ReplyDeleteThank You Ana for being smarter than Sarah and Stormy.
DeleteHey Sarah,
ReplyDeleteIm so glad that I have left such a great impact on your life that you made a whole blog about me. But half of this blog is a half truth. I have never judged you for how you want to live. I have judged you for trying to force the lifestyle on us. As far as the twitter attacks. I do believe you and your hubby started on us. I feel that society no longer has gender roles. the army has started recruiting for its first all female special forces team. so i do believe we live in a society where the gender barrier is broken. there are stay at home dads now instead of moms. as far as my daughter i have asked you not to talk to her and now you mention her in your blog. here is the thing with that you are the adult. do the adult thing and block her. as far as twitter. no one forces you to follow us feel free to block me. it will probably be a welcomed gift. men being men. in my opinion men do not have to dominate and discipline there wives. as far as the comment of me saying you are slapping women in the face and soldiers who have died fighting for your rights in the face i still stand by this reason being you feel all women should be like this. all of these comments are just how i feel. if that is the lifestyle you want so be it you are FREE to choose it but just like you do not want to be judged or attacked for your DD lifestyle do not judge and attack me for how i choose to live my life.
Sorry but I witnessed that twitter fiasco and Sarah was attacked. I meanI saw once where Jason your wife or gf or whatever she is tagged Sarah and 2 other DD wives in her tweets about how they were stupid for being submissive and they were abused. Your woman seems to have a superioty complex about not being submissive. Didn't she even comment once on Stromy's blog about how Stormy was dumb for missing her husband cause he went out of town and how would she feel if she had to deal with a deployment like she does? I agree with others who commented, she has no right to complain about a deployment since she chose to be with you knowing your job. And I have to agree with comments Sarah has made where she said your woman was wrong for making you put her over your job. No man should do that. I think it is also wrong how you two went on Stormy's blog and ridiculed her and called her husband abusive. Also, you and your family did make fun of Sarah for her submission.
ReplyDeleteAnd as far as gender roles being erased from society. Right, they have been. But is it really better that they have been? When men were defined as the leaders of their house and the breadwinners and more dominate like they should be, divorce was lower. But now it seems to expected for men to let women walk all over them. I am also in a DD marriage. I also felt like I wanted all control but I disrespected my husband and he got fed up. He said something had to change and had been researching. He came upon the CDD website and brought it up. He remembered the one time he did take me over his knee before we got married..I didn't like it but it settled my attitude. No, it may not work for all marriages because some men just arent' gonna have the balls to take the reigns and willa always let their wives walk all over them. and yes, I agree it is great that we have the freedom. But also feminism has kind of messed some things up.
So Jason you are saying you would stand there and let your woman just yell at you and cuss you out and TELL you what to do? Also you would do whatever she asked for? Think not.
Oh and about the twitter comments, your wife/gf whatever also got her other little army wife friends taking her side and also belittling Sarah. That is call bullying.
I'm proud my man has the guts to not take my shit and stand up to me.
Heather
Heather,
ReplyDeleteI respect that you want to live your marriage that way if that is what works for you then cool. You have not tried to force this lifestyle onto us. All of these damn DD blogs say the same thing. The woman dont like it. I was hesitant at first. the world needs to let men be men. i am getting used to it but i still dont like the discipline. Blah blah blah. if you want to live in a house where you let the man rule the castle cool i got it. Obviously you have not seen or do not agree that sarah has been a bully on twitter dont wanna see it cool to each is own. Just like i respect your decision to submit to your man in your marriage I ask that you respect the right of how i would like my relationship to be. As far as my daughter why does no one see that an adult should do the adult thing and block the child. you wouldnt tell a cop well officer she came on to me and started playing with me. why because you would stop it because you are the adult. military issue have you guys ever stopped to think that when my contract is up that is 8 years. ok i have kids that i dont get to see very often that are ready to have their daddy back.
Sarah,
As far as you thinking i am cute thank you for the compliment I will ask you this again please do the adult thing and block my daughter. someone told me that your hubby has tweeted her too. again i ask you to get him to do the adult thing and block her. That is crossing the line she is a child and shouldnt be involved in our bickering or rivalries. My ex is still very protective over me that will not change.
Overall,
those of you that feel dd work for you and want to participate in it. "not my couch not my problem" that is up to you and your husband to decide. I will always openly read your opinion and not judge you unless you attack me and then we have somethings to talk work out and come to and understanding about. also do not judge me because i do not believe nor want to participate in the DD lifestyle. Thank you
the comment from your girl below is what I'm talking about. Women in DD marriages have so much more respect than to go trashing other's men and cussing like she did. Yes I do think Stormy's husband is a much better husband. He has a lot more people who also think so.
DeleteThis is America she is expressing her first admendment right just as you are here. We do not always agree with you. That is what makes American great many different people with many different opinions. She does not try to censure you so I ask that you do not try to censure her.
DeleteFirst off I will say this, whoever is jealous of Stormy and her husband and looks up to them as a couple and wants their man like her need to have their head examined cause they are fucking morons!! Bitches praise Stormy's bastard abusive chicken shit husband. And yes he is a little chicken shit boy cause he wants to hurt his wife when he doesn't get his way and she doesn't obey him and follow what he wants! Pathetic. I mean yeah I am a lot like her also, I have that same fiery attitude and I'm very rebellious. I like to be independent and I do put up tons of walls.I push him away very often, when I'm mad I yell and no he doesn't yell back. I am working on my walls cause I know it does hurt him. But he also understands WHY I have walls up which is because of my past.
ReplyDeleteI could NEVER be with a man or respect a man who thought I HAD to obey him and thought to cause me physical pain if I didn't. I just don't believe marriage is ever about that and physical pain should NEVER take place. I don't see how any woman in her right mind can respect a man who tries to control them and if they don't hurts her.
Also dumb ass people looking up to Stormy's little boy husband wanna take everything he says literally and then try and push is beliefs on others. and take it waay too far. Also I don't see why you need to be hurt to make a marriage work..if you can't work out issues go to fucking marriage counseling. I mean yeah we have our arguments, and but we ALWAYS work them out without yelling and him causing me physical pain. Also hell no to a bed time for me. I will stay up how ever late I want and if it's online oh well.
And as far a him spoiling me and giving me whatever I want, that's none of your business, you comment a lot on it so maybe you're jealous because your husband won't. Like he said, him being in the army is OUR choice not only his. Distance is hard on him also...so yeah it also makes me love him more that he will put me over a job he loves. He is 27 and I'm 28, just cause we are young doesn't mean our relationship won't work or we don't know each other well enough to know how to have a real one. He knows me better than anyone, when we aren't together he knows when I'm not ok. That's a bond not too many people have.
I don't have a problem with WOMEN asking for DD, but yes I have a problem with men doing it because I think it shows they have a inferior complex with women and think its their right to be HEAD. Like Ashley from the AlovesZ blog you showed me, she pisses me off cause she thinks men are wrong to let a woman be over them and be bossy. Bitch can shut up.
Laurie is about the only one that seems to have any sense, and she understands more than most DD women. I mean you guys supported that Mickki bitch from another blog for letting her husband hit their son. She was a moron also cause there is NEVER any reason to hit your kid at ANY age. That's something we both believe in.
Also, I do wake up most the time when he does to go to work but I wouldn't say I'd get up every morning and make his lunch, and he wouldn't expect me to. He knows how to do it himself. He also wouldn't expect me to get up when he does or go to bed when he does. I don't need to be glued to his side all the time. Stormy's husband is just too possessive and I'd walk right out the damn door regardless if he wanted me to go out with friends or not. I mean now, if we didn't have plans together and a friend wanted to hang out, yeah I'd go.
So, yeah I'm more bossy, spoiled, and put up walls but I it's a lot better than being told what to do and no I don't see him any less of a man, I actually see him as more of a man. My man is amazing, romantic he sends me texts, emails, and morning sweet messages before he goes to work. So don't say that DD men are better because they aren't. Not all.
Nic
That's what I'm talking about. The way women cuss like that..I mean to me it's very disrespecful. You talking about other women's husbands. How would you like it if they did yours? I mean I don't think I need to be examined for thinking Stormy from http://stormy-shelterinthestorm.blogspot.com/ has a wonderful husband. And yes mine is so much like him. I feel lucky that I have a man that looks after me and won't let me harm us or our marriage and demands that I also respect him also because it is what he deserves. No Nicole, your husband is not a real man. I think he is afraid to take control but really wants to. I can't see how any man is ok with a woman controlling their marriage or relationship. And I mean, I have been nice to him but just got attacked by his family. I mean if you cuss at others, you probably cuss at him and no man will keep taking it. Yes you made a big deal out of him putting you over the Army. To me you Army wives know what you are getting yourself into when you marry or get with a soldier, so I don't think you have any right to complain about it or demand he get out. And maybe he just tells you it's your choice also but deep down it is soley his choice.
ReplyDeleteBeing spoiled and bossy aren't good traits though. No I don't want my husband to give me every single thing i want because then I wouldn't keep respecting him. And I make his lunch and dinner because he works and it's a nice thing for me to do. Yes I have seen the tweets you send him and some he has sent you and they are sweet, but our husbands just seem to be soo much more attentive and affectionate.
Yeah I do believe in the Bible verse that says we are to submit to our husbands..I won't change that view. I don't understand why men don't want to be HOH like they should be. I think if you keep up treating him like crap your relationship won't survive.
Ok first of all I dont see her as in control. I believe a relationship is a partnership. No one has to step in and take control that is where compromise comes in. As far as being afraid of taking control that is a false statement as I believe that no one has to be in control. I am not going to attack you. I will repeat once again what i have said before. How you choose to live your life is on you. You are entitled to your opinions. Just allow me to have mine. If you think I am not a man because I dont try to rule that is fine. I respect your opinion but I do not agree with it. I feel that I am a man. I care for and treat the woman I am with in a way I treat all the women I am with. I dont believe woman should be submissive and men dominant. As far as the Bible goes, It also says that men should treat woman in a way they would their mother. I do not see a son spanking his mom when he feels she may be out of line. Sorry again it may happen who knows. If you want to live your DD lifestlye that is fine you are free to do so. But if I want to live a nonDD lifestyle please do not judge me or put me down for not wanting to follow what you believe is right. I am an American and I have the right to be in the relationship style of my choosing. As far as HOH all this means to mean is a phrase on a tax document. I see DD as negative and I do not like negativity. As far as her treating me like crap. Please dont throw out accusations on what you know nothing about. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteAlso if you wanna preach about the Bible, women aren't supposed to speak in church, or hold ANY authority over men. Well I guess I'm going to hell cause I do hold some authority over him and I have spoke in church before.
ReplyDelete